sound : Epitaph - King Crimson
Day: January 27th; 2006 EV
Time: (approx) 9:27 AM
i was listening to "The Undertaker (Renholder Remix)" by Puscifer, driving along highway 60 like i always do... i was on my way to drop mama at work... on the way to the mall i see shay and her aunt at the signal in the car beside mine... we wave at each other.... everyone smiles....
i drop mama at work and i get back on highway 60 to go pick up papa... he's at the toyota dealership; maintenance for his car..... i drive like i usually do.....
"stupid water tanker... going too slow..... why can't these dumbasses stop blocking our way?..."
i change lanes.... the truck in front of me slows down...... i look in the rear view mirror... uh oh.... i stop smiling...
oh fuck....
WHAM!...
im hit in the back by a semi.... an eighteen wheeler....
BAM!....
hit the second time..... i somehow manage not to get crushed between the two trucks......
next thing i know i'm on the next lane.... in shock.... i was shivering.....
first thing i did was to put on my hazard lights..... i couldn't get out of the car yet... i didn't want to see what had happened to poor layla....
"how bad is it?.... how did i end up on this lane?... why me?... why the fuck is it always me?.... will i go to jail?.... how can i afford insurance after this?.... i could have been crushed...."
i turn off my stereo, look down at my hands.... damn, they're still shaking.... i moved my head slowly so as to check whether i have whiplash.... nothing.... no physical injuries.....
i get out of the car and move towards the truck.... i peep in through the passenger door.... i knock and i open the door.... the driver is a lady.... not much older than me..... she looked like she saw a ghost... almost in tears even.... "are you ok?", i feel stupid immediately afterwords.... i was hit.... why do i need to comfort her when i'm just as scared, if not more?.....
i call papa and thomas uncle.....
i stand outside.... my hair flying all over the place in the chilly wind, i button up my favorite brown suede jacket.... i took a look at the back of my car.... first time after the accident.... i felt my heart shatter into a million pieces...
my car... my beautiful, lovely car.... ruined.... in an accident...... and she's barely a month old.... twenty two days to be exact..... oh man....
i felt THAT feeling.... the feeling one gets when they want to cry but they don't.... it's the hardest to handle, where you know you want to break down but you just won... not that you're stopping yourself, it's just that your body just wont.....
papa came before the police... he looked at the car and said something.... i don't remember what.... i don't even remember how i ended up on the third lane... did i skid there?.... or did i turn so that i don't get sandwiched between the two trucks?....
i look up at the sky and i see a bird flying overhead.....
i continued looking at the bird till it was nothing more than a speck over the horizon....
peacerespectempathy
1.24.2006
Moan # 2334
sound : 666 - John Frusciante
watching eric clapton play "old love" i realized something.... its been more than 2 months since i sat down and played proper guitar... and now, i feel bad.... yeah, im busy and stuff but that's no excuse....let me see.... let me wait till next month.... after my payments and stuff.... if i can afford it, i might go for guitar classes.... hmm.... yeah.... thats a good thing.....
peacerespectempathy
watching eric clapton play "old love" i realized something.... its been more than 2 months since i sat down and played proper guitar... and now, i feel bad.... yeah, im busy and stuff but that's no excuse....let me see.... let me wait till next month.... after my payments and stuff.... if i can afford it, i might go for guitar classes.... hmm.... yeah.... thats a good thing.....
peacerespectempathy
1.20.2006
i eat humans for fun and proteins....
sound : Carvel - John Frusciante
check in out... i have finally gotten my butt into myspace... the brothel of pop-culture.... all thanks to shunda....
check in out... i have finally gotten my butt into myspace... the brothel of pop-culture.... all thanks to shunda....
peacerespectempathy
1.14.2006
Venus In Furs
- The Velvet Underground and Nico
Shiny, shiny, shiny boots of leather,
Whiplash girl-child in the dark
Comes in bells, your servant, don't forsake him.
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart.
Downy sins of streetlight fancies
Chase the costumes she shall wear.
Ermine furs adorn the imperious.
Severin, Severin awaits you there.
I am tired. I am weary.
I could sleep for a thousand years
A thousand dreams that would awake me,
Different colors made of tears.
Kiss the boot of shiny, shiny leather,
Shiny leather in the dark.
Tongue of thongs, the belt that does await you,
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart
Severin, Severin, speak so slightly,
Severin, down on your bended knee.
Taste the whip, in love not given lightly,
Taste the whip, now plead for me.
I am tired. I am weary.
I could sleep for a thousand years
A thousand dreams that would awake me.
Different colors made of tears.
Shiny, shiny, shiny boots of leather,
Whiplash girlchild in the dark.
Severin, your servant comes in bells, please don't forsake him.
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart.
1.11.2006
life's phlegm
sound : Sidewinder - Avenged Sevenfold
listening to modern punk and screamo on my manager's daughter's ipod....
colleen is a booze drinking, chain smoking twenty year old emo girl who works at macy's..... she's nice though....
craving an eastwood 3p deluxe....
will my dear sweet guardian angel please buy me one?...... (from here)
joking around about sharing a bunch of playboy bunnies with a bisexual goth girl....
yesterday was my first day of school.... i was talking to this goth girl (forgot her name) before class and she said she'd get me playboy bunnies if and only if i'd share them with her, to which i gladly agreed..... i can't be too greedy about bunnies.... at first, i was kinda freaked out about class because i'm taking math for lliberal arts 1 this semester but i have juanita to keep me company.... and the professor isn't all that evil....
grinning to myself thinking about layla....
i love my car....
escaping castration just because im "so damn cute"....
we were doing inventory in macy's and everyone was tired.... i made a major boo-boo in my section and my manager noreen told me that she would have castrated me if i weren't "so damn cute".... i guess she's losing her eyesigh or something....
flirting with the walmart girl....
i went to return this broken folder at walmart and this cute girl in the customer service section named jen starts making the moves on me.... ladies and germs.... major ego boost for your's truly.... well i responded likewise and finally i told her i'd see her around and walked away....
finding out that my iranian friend likes me....
big-ass long story.....
discussing my "pimpin" glasses" with dexter from work....
dexter is this cool black guy at macy's... he plays the keyboard like a true player, sax like a full-blown jazzman and the man is one heck of a "playa"..... trust me.... he's fun to be around....
trust me, there's way too much going on right now.... i mean seriously.... this isn't the usual whiney post that you'd usually see from me.... no.... this is me looking down on my life and feeling kinda happy about it (for once)....
i managed to get a differment on payment of my tuition for two months on account of my smile.....
yeah.... seriously.... my financial aid advisor is this cute cuban girl.... i kinda buttered her up by calling her an angel and stuff..... yeah, i know... i'm a slimey, greasy little bastard...
a colleague from work, diana, let me copy "city of evil" by avenged sevenfold..... now that is one good cd..... seriously.... the guitaring is perfect, the drumming is excellent, the bass is good and the vocals are ok..... i got "ten thousand fists" (disturbed) from thomas, a 15 year old guitar virtuoso and i got "the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" dvd from greg, a 60 year old biker... no, he does not ride a hog or a chopper.... he rides a 1000cc sports bike......
i met tuyet a few days back... she came all the way to the mall from st pete just to see me.... we sat outside in the cold and she told me that she's signed up for the army... she leaves on the 15th of feb... fuck, what a stupid thing to do?.... what did i de when she told me?... i punched her on the shoulder.... but in the end i realized that she's gotta do what she has to to et through her issues..... we spoke for a little while and she had to go.... i hugged her and as she started her car i jumped up and climbed up onto her hood and stood there.... that was kinda funny..... thatnk eric clapton that i didn't fall.... coem to think of it, that was a stupid thing to do..... heh heh heh...
peacerespectempathy
POST SCRIPT: i just read through all that i'd just put down and all i see is the vomit of a self-indulgent bastard.... I RULE!!!
listening to modern punk and screamo on my manager's daughter's ipod....
colleen is a booze drinking, chain smoking twenty year old emo girl who works at macy's..... she's nice though....
craving an eastwood 3p deluxe....
will my dear sweet guardian angel please buy me one?...... (from here)
joking around about sharing a bunch of playboy bunnies with a bisexual goth girl....
yesterday was my first day of school.... i was talking to this goth girl (forgot her name) before class and she said she'd get me playboy bunnies if and only if i'd share them with her, to which i gladly agreed..... i can't be too greedy about bunnies.... at first, i was kinda freaked out about class because i'm taking math for lliberal arts 1 this semester but i have juanita to keep me company.... and the professor isn't all that evil....
grinning to myself thinking about layla....
i love my car....
escaping castration just because im "so damn cute"....
we were doing inventory in macy's and everyone was tired.... i made a major boo-boo in my section and my manager noreen told me that she would have castrated me if i weren't "so damn cute".... i guess she's losing her eyesigh or something....
flirting with the walmart girl....
i went to return this broken folder at walmart and this cute girl in the customer service section named jen starts making the moves on me.... ladies and germs.... major ego boost for your's truly.... well i responded likewise and finally i told her i'd see her around and walked away....
finding out that my iranian friend likes me....
big-ass long story.....
discussing my "pimpin" glasses" with dexter from work....
dexter is this cool black guy at macy's... he plays the keyboard like a true player, sax like a full-blown jazzman and the man is one heck of a "playa"..... trust me.... he's fun to be around....
trust me, there's way too much going on right now.... i mean seriously.... this isn't the usual whiney post that you'd usually see from me.... no.... this is me looking down on my life and feeling kinda happy about it (for once)....
i managed to get a differment on payment of my tuition for two months on account of my smile.....
yeah.... seriously.... my financial aid advisor is this cute cuban girl.... i kinda buttered her up by calling her an angel and stuff..... yeah, i know... i'm a slimey, greasy little bastard...
a colleague from work, diana, let me copy "city of evil" by avenged sevenfold..... now that is one good cd..... seriously.... the guitaring is perfect, the drumming is excellent, the bass is good and the vocals are ok..... i got "ten thousand fists" (disturbed) from thomas, a 15 year old guitar virtuoso and i got "the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" dvd from greg, a 60 year old biker... no, he does not ride a hog or a chopper.... he rides a 1000cc sports bike......
i met tuyet a few days back... she came all the way to the mall from st pete just to see me.... we sat outside in the cold and she told me that she's signed up for the army... she leaves on the 15th of feb... fuck, what a stupid thing to do?.... what did i de when she told me?... i punched her on the shoulder.... but in the end i realized that she's gotta do what she has to to et through her issues..... we spoke for a little while and she had to go.... i hugged her and as she started her car i jumped up and climbed up onto her hood and stood there.... that was kinda funny..... thatnk eric clapton that i didn't fall.... coem to think of it, that was a stupid thing to do..... heh heh heh...
peacerespectempathy
POST SCRIPT: i just read through all that i'd just put down and all i see is the vomit of a self-indulgent bastard.... I RULE!!!
1.05.2006
Layla
sound : Layla - Eric Clapton
i finally have my baby and i do not thank god-dude or anybody for it..... yes, i have finally bought a car.... a 2006 civic lx.... 4 door sedan.... black with ivory interiors..... yes, yes.... i am finally mobile my dear little worms... and those damn reptiles can't do wack about it... but the truth is, im going to be broke for the rest of my life..... i am doing all payments including the $1000 down..... 400 big ones a month!.... ouch-ola man!.... but oh well.... she's a fine one and i love her......
why did i name her layla?.... well, as i was signing the contract for the car (in exchange for my soul being given to the devil?) in the dealership, the song "Layla" just blared out of the speakers there... it was like XM radio knew what they were doing... the universe aligned and god-dude finally looked down on me and smiled.... then he got all cocky and now i have to hang a rosary ("I'm melting!") in the car..... but yeah.... at that moment i knew whta i was going to call her..... Layla......
"Like a fool, i fell in love with you,
You turned my whole world upside down.
LAYLA!"
peacerespectempathy
i finally have my baby and i do not thank god-dude or anybody for it..... yes, i have finally bought a car.... a 2006 civic lx.... 4 door sedan.... black with ivory interiors..... yes, yes.... i am finally mobile my dear little worms... and those damn reptiles can't do wack about it... but the truth is, im going to be broke for the rest of my life..... i am doing all payments including the $1000 down..... 400 big ones a month!.... ouch-ola man!.... but oh well.... she's a fine one and i love her......
why did i name her layla?.... well, as i was signing the contract for the car (in exchange for my soul being given to the devil?) in the dealership, the song "Layla" just blared out of the speakers there... it was like XM radio knew what they were doing... the universe aligned and god-dude finally looked down on me and smiled.... then he got all cocky and now i have to hang a rosary ("I'm melting!") in the car..... but yeah.... at that moment i knew whta i was going to call her..... Layla......
"Like a fool, i fell in love with you,
You turned my whole world upside down.
LAYLA!"
peacerespectempathy
pigfart
sound : breathing....
it's confusing about how things just flow along.... you hit ona religious freak after you tell her that jesus was a pot smoking hippie and that dubya is a limey, scum-sucking bastard and you still end up with a nice smile and a wink?.... huh?.... what the fart man?.... funny how a marriage proposal to a mysterious wiccan chick goes down the drain because you mention threesomes and voyeuristic lesbian sex..... oh yeah... the things i go through..... i was being taught how to cheer by an eleven yar old girl.... an i finally met my white half brother/twin/clone person..... well oh well..... working the day after..... my oh my.... and being hired permanently?..... need a car... must get a car.... i deserve a car, dont i?..... guitar.... fuck.... frustration coming up again.... must think positively.... happy place.... mountains, waterfalls..... sweet calming music.... eric clapton... jack white.... guitar... GUITAR!!!.... crap!.... must change topic.... confusion.... yes, positive stuff.... destroyed FUBAR.... unFUBARred my life... good, good.... school opening again.... YAY.... (can't believe i just said yay about school opening)... math and art apreciation.... mallus still confused why im not doing medicine..... told them to fart off..... blank stares... confusion... lots of work.... must bank checks... no money otherwise.... must finish dæmonomania too.... got to finish early.... late fees too high.... watched blow again..... kinda happpy about that.... dreamt of cool johnny deppp glasses.... must get glasses.... must get guitar!!!.... crap!.... i aint getting anywhere..... this girl at work likes me.... looks ok and everything... has bad breath.... feel my soul trying to escape out of my butt each time i talk to her.... damn reptiles!!... all their fault..... stupid scaley beasts with peanut brains!!.... must think.... damn!.... im going to turn 22 this year.... im a dinosaur... im becoming one of them..... im becoming a reptile!!!... help me jebus..... you pot smoking hippie..... dear eric clapton, save me from god-dude (the fake one), jebus, dubya, the reptiles and from myself... your true disciple... me... "while my guitar gently weeps"....
peacerespectempathy
it's confusing about how things just flow along.... you hit ona religious freak after you tell her that jesus was a pot smoking hippie and that dubya is a limey, scum-sucking bastard and you still end up with a nice smile and a wink?.... huh?.... what the fart man?.... funny how a marriage proposal to a mysterious wiccan chick goes down the drain because you mention threesomes and voyeuristic lesbian sex..... oh yeah... the things i go through..... i was being taught how to cheer by an eleven yar old girl.... an i finally met my white half brother/twin/clone person..... well oh well..... working the day after..... my oh my.... and being hired permanently?..... need a car... must get a car.... i deserve a car, dont i?..... guitar.... fuck.... frustration coming up again.... must think positively.... happy place.... mountains, waterfalls..... sweet calming music.... eric clapton... jack white.... guitar... GUITAR!!!.... crap!.... must change topic.... confusion.... yes, positive stuff.... destroyed FUBAR.... unFUBARred my life... good, good.... school opening again.... YAY.... (can't believe i just said yay about school opening)... math and art apreciation.... mallus still confused why im not doing medicine..... told them to fart off..... blank stares... confusion... lots of work.... must bank checks... no money otherwise.... must finish dæmonomania too.... got to finish early.... late fees too high.... watched blow again..... kinda happpy about that.... dreamt of cool johnny deppp glasses.... must get glasses.... must get guitar!!!.... crap!.... i aint getting anywhere..... this girl at work likes me.... looks ok and everything... has bad breath.... feel my soul trying to escape out of my butt each time i talk to her.... damn reptiles!!... all their fault..... stupid scaley beasts with peanut brains!!.... must think.... damn!.... im going to turn 22 this year.... im a dinosaur... im becoming one of them..... im becoming a reptile!!!... help me jebus..... you pot smoking hippie..... dear eric clapton, save me from god-dude (the fake one), jebus, dubya, the reptiles and from myself... your true disciple... me... "while my guitar gently weeps"....
peacerespectempathy
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