9.24.2007

Ava Koertig

Her many facial piercings catch your eyes. All sparkling and pretty, all gold and diamonds, all over her face. Piercings on the bridge of her nose, her nostrils, her tongue, on her lips, on her ears, on her cheeks, on her eyebrows; all of which have least one diamond on them. Her almond shaped eyes are black, like the darkest nights of winter. Chocolate skin of perfect texture, hair in a huge ‘fro, long silver nails. Her clothing was a mixture of funky, grindhouse chic and Janis Joplin on acid. Her platforms were at least six inches tall. She wore an eye-patch (not unlike a pirate) over her left eye. Her perfect features combined with her formidable height (thanks to those custom made platforms) and the facial perforations made her quite a formidable figure.


Ava Koertig was raised in a small town in central Germany called Niestetal. She was adopted by a rabbi who lived there and was brought up in the Jewish tradition. At age sixteen she kissed her sleeping step-mother on the cheek, left a note on her step-father’s table and left to travel the world. Ava traveled far and wide; two years later, she was married for forty three days and sixteen hours to a certain James David from Sydney, Australia. The ceremony took place in Tampa, Florida on a golf course owned by a prominent lawyer with a 1-800 number. Her trail vanishes after that for seven years and then all of a sudden she reappears at her adoptive parents’ doorstep with three missing toes, a glass eye, a face full of piercings and approximately seventy four million American dollars in various Swiss accounts. Nobody knows what occurred in those seven years that Ava disappeared.


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noise: Pelican - Pink Mammoth

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