brain-sperm

sound : White Rabbit - Jefferson Airplane

many moons have passed since we last met my pretties..... oh yes.... changes are abound...

"the times they are a-changing"...

meeting these old remnants from another generation surely brings out so much in you.... even if all of them are way too progressive for their times.... seriously..... eating italian food and praising the things that you hate you float on, higher and higher into the mess that is life.... discuss suits and cologne, cameras and how little money im going to make.... aah yes, the life of an american ex-patriot(?)....

"bow down before the one you serve, you're gonna get what you deserve."

limewire just refuses to work.... i hate this.....

freaky... this anneurismic feeling of delusional cheer that is christmas.... i have no christmas spirit in me..... i have done half of my christmas shopping but why shop at all?.... this girl likes me.... and i have no idea on how to tur her down without hurting her..... finally the answer popped into my head.... gift-card!!.... they are truly god-dude's greatest gift to mankind....

it's truly depressing thinking about your favorite times with your favorite people.... but what's the use?.... it's just masturbation..... dreaming and thought is just masturbation for the Physical You.... i spend half of my life masturbating.... the rest i spend weeping and moaning like a wimp on a mexican soap opera.....

this monster feeling that is _____ is so god-frickin'-damn annoying that i just feel like ripping it out from deep within my belly and flushiong it down with all the poop and crap and crud that is my spirit....

"PSYCHO! GROUPIE! COCAINE! CRAZY!"

im quitting at Mickey D's... yeah... the grime sweat and oozing fat has gotten to me.... i can't stand it any more..... those bastard cows that become the burgers talk to me at night... i made the decision to quit when i dreamt that i was serving human burgers to cows and pigs.... those damn pigs....

the trusth is that i now know almost half of all the olod farts orders at McD's.... people strted telling me that im gonna own ten of the damn places in a few years and other such supposedly flattering things.... the old farts have got to find somebody else to memorize their orders now because i now sell suits and pants and shirts and ties at Macy's.... the pay is better plus there's commision on whatever i sell along with the pay they give me.... and during the holidays the work is kinda tiring but it's all good.... think $24.8 an hour.... ladies and germs, that is how much i mad the day before yesterday (hourly pay and commision included).... now how is that for a nice job?... agreed after the holidays it's going to get a little slower but there is always the hourly pay they give me.... good god man... "im lovin' it!"...

but all of this capital flow is hurting me.... my last day at McD's is next week.... so right now im doing two jobs... the day before yesterday i worked 16 hours..... exhausting not to say the least but after next week it's going to get better....

i miss tuyet.... she moved away.... she's moved to st pete... she's in NY right now..... hating it.... she lost her phone and she's not enjoying it one bit..... calls up like 5 to 6 times a day just to talk..... she remembers just two numbers... mine and another friend of hers named jen..... i miss her.... yeah... i got her an american eagle t-shirt and glasses..... she said she'll be back in brandon for christmas and then go back to st pete....

i got tiffnie a tinkerbell bag from hot topic.... speaking about hot topic, i have gained a new-found respect o the spawning ground of wannabe-culture..... i bought both the new tool dvd singles (parabola and schism) from them on the day of it's release (december 20th)... the videos are cool.... the idea of dual commentries is awesome and the remixes by LUSTMORD are just plain cool.... long drawn out epic mixes of the songs... perfect for an lsd trip.....

"my lamb and martyr, this will be over soon.
you look so precious. you look so precious.
you look so precious. you look so precious.
you look so precious now. you look so precious."

aerosmith and lenny kravitz coming to tampa on the 17th of january.... townshend and the gang are going to tour next year.... coldplay's coming here in march.... i wish i have enough money to go.....

i got work at 5.... damn... i gotta fix up my ensemble for today.... shirt, pant, belt, tie... and they should all flow.... i am becoming that which i despise.... a sales-person..... i sell.... i sell.... i put more money into the grubby hands of all those corporate bastards who i hate so much.... i wear designer clothes and smooth talk people into buying overpriced clothing made in the sweat shops of vietnam..... but the thing is, im getting a lot of money doing this....

"DEAD INSIDE! DEAD INSIDE!
DEAD INSIDE! DEAD INSIDE!"

"shit adds up at the bottom"

i need a colonic... to cleanse myself.... an enema..... something to remove all of this negativity from myself..... i have plans for next year that i dare not speak to anyone about because it would be shot down like a poor retarded duck during hunting season..... oh well....

i truly believe that the mall is the breeding ground for 13 year old whores and pimps and wannabe gangsta's, pseudo-punks with fiery red hair and weepy goths all in black with their green mohawks a bright flag to mark their entrance into the worlds of commercialized deviance..... the whole method of thought is dead.... the email arun sent me was edifying and oh so true of our times....

"que onda amigo?"

"pour que?"

FUCK YOU!

peacerespectempathy

While My Guitar Gently Weeps

- George Harrison

I look at you all see the love there that's sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
I look at the floor and I see it needs sweeping
Still my guitar gently weeps

I don't know why nobody told you
How to unfold your love
I don't know how someone controlled you
They bought and sold you

I look at the world and I notice it's turning
While my guitar gently weeps
With every mistake we must surely be learning
Still my guitar gently weeps

I don't know how you were diverted
You were perverted too
I don't know how you were inverted
No one alerted you

I look from the wings at the play you are staging
While my guitar gently weeps
As I'm sitting here doing nothing but aging
Still my guitar gently weeps